"Forever Reign"



So, last Monday (2/7) I was brought to the revelation and reminded that God is eternal. Simple enough, right? That is something we are taught tracing all the way back to elementary years. God never had a beginning and will never meet an end. With faith, I know this to be true, but I also know that I'll never be able to wrap my my mind around that aspect of God.  But... here is what is new to my way of thinking:  Not only God's 'life' and presence are eternal, but every aspect and characteristic is just as everlasting.
That is to say that God possesses enduring peace, imperishable joy, boundless righteousness,  relentless wrath, ageless justice, unbroken grace, incessant mercy, everlasting love, etc... (the list describing His character may very well be just as infinite.)
This, is all together, something more personal and that much more endearing of my Saviour. Before the world was made, before He spoke it into being... He was there, yes, but also He loved me. Not even a cell of mine had begun to form, I was but a thought in His mind, but with that thought He was well pleased.



My God loved me. My God loves me. My God will love me.



 This is something that I have struggled with in the past- continuing on even today.
I have the "head knowledge" and even in situations the biblical knowledge that Jesus loves me or even that I am "my Father's favorite child".  It is a whole new thing entirely to know and believe it with your heart and walk in it daily.

To me this is something more than love (What could be more? What could He possibly bestow upon me that means more than unconditional love?) This means forgiveness... This means freedom!

No matter what I have done, No matter how many times I mess up... He is still there.
Now that is something that breaks my heart but restores it to the uttermost, if only I would allow it to do so.

When I mess up, I tend to not allow Him to forgive me, I won't even forgive myself. 
I sit drowning in self-pity, wallowing in self-hatred... all the while my King just waits to grant mercy. 
He whispers "You are more" and a sweet reminder from my beautiful friend is that God whispers "I love you. I think you're beautiful. I think you're worthy. I'm especially fond of you. I love your heart. My heart melts when you smile. I catch every tear that falls. I hold your life in my hands." -and that is only a glimpse. 
Why do I so often forget?  God, You, alone are forever.
not my fear, not my worries, not my shame

You, my King, forever reign